Quote of the day...

"Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart. Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens." - Carl Jung

Rainy Sunday Catch Up

I woke up to the sound of rain this morning and it is falling once again. Nothing like a rainy Sunday to get caught up on life - laundry, dishes, emails, phone calls, etc. Alan is off dive mastering at dive class this afternoon, so it's just me and the house plants.

So, I had a big interview on Friday at an agency - Community Connections - in Washington DC. It is located on Pennsylvania Ave just a hop skip and a jump from the Capitol. You can actually see the Capitol from the office. It was supposed to be an all day interview/shadowing kind of deal, but ended up only being an initial interview with the Associate Director for Community Support Services. The position's official title is Dual Diagnosis Clinical Case Manager. The agency uses an integrated system of therapy/counseling and case management. This means I get to do both! This is fantastic. So, I would be in charge of a caseload of 25 individuals with both mental health and substance abuse problems. I'd see them in my office (how cool!) and in their homes. Long story short, this is a fantastic agency and I am really hoping to land the job. Turns out that I have I will be shadowing the supervisor of the Dual Diagnosis team and then have a second interview on Tuesday. I have a really good feeling about all of this. The best things in life ARE worth the wait! I think it is meant to be. I will say though, never in my life did I imagine that I would be working in downtown Washington DC a few blocks from our nation's capitol! Pretty cool huh?

On other fronts, Alan is back from a work week in Kentucky. I'm very glad to have him back. It was a bit of a rough week. There were a lot of things coming my way all at once, and I had a bit of a freak out moment. It just needed to happen. Lots of changes are happening in my life, and I think most of them have finally sunk in. It's just all a lot to swallow. I'm still working on the balance between independence and my partnership with Alan. It's all new, and definitely an adjustment. But, I absolutely couldn't be happier. I really love the choices that I've made that have brought me out here. It's difficult at times, but I'm making it work. It's just those darn growing experiences that are hard to make it through. haha. Who needs growth? Well, we all do. So here's to going for it! No one ever said life was easy!

So, Friday night he came home and had a fun date night all planned out. We ended up at Cheeseburger In Paradise for dinner and then had some fun playing some miniature golf. It was great! Yesterday we got to hang out and just relax together and then headed into Baltimore for another afternoon of diving at the National Aquarium.

I think that about sums it up. Another post after my big day on Tuesday!

Adventures, etc.

Let me start with Friday...

Friday was the one year anniversary of when we lost Ann. It's a day that I will never forget and one of the worst in my life to date. But, after a good cry and discussion with Alan about it, I decided there was no point in moping around all day and being sad. Ann would not have wanted that. She would want us to be happy and celebrate. So, after pondering what I wanted to do that evening with Alan, I decided what a better way to honor my beloved Auntie Gold than to spend the evening cooking with my amazing other half? So, I decided I would teach him how to make lasagna just like Ann taught me many years ago. And, to top it all off we decided to make some of Grandma's amazing chocolate chip cookies. While we were cooking I was sharing some of my fondest memories about baking cookies with Grandma and Ann when I was growing up. I even had Alan taste some vanilla, which I learned early on smells delicious but does not have a taste to match. The cookies turned out beautifully! They would have been proud. Earlier on in the day, I even caught a bit of a classic movie and one of Ann's favorites, When Harry Met Sally, on TV. It turned out to be a perfect evening and one that I know Ann would have enjoyed. I'm sure she enjoyed watching us cook together, something we do almost every night, and laugh and enjoy life in our new home.

Saturday...
We had plans to get up Saturday morning and head to Harpers Ferry, WV and go tubing down the Potomac River with Dan and AJ, some friends of Alan's who are now friends of mine. Let me just tell you it was an absolute blast! Alan has done some white water rafting as well as some tubing down the river here in WV with his co-workers, and he wanted to go again so that I could join in the fun. I'm so glad we did! It turned out to be somewhat overcast, but it was beautiful. We had our own tubes, complete with head rest and cup holders from beverages, so that made things significantly less complicated. We packed some coolers and launched ourselves down the river. We hit some rocks and some small rapids along the way, but it made for a great Saturday adventure. After grabbing a quick bite to eat and a shower, we headed into DC to meet up with some friends of mine in Georgetown. My dear friend Laura (aka, Fuzz) and her sister came to visit some friends, and we got to catch up with them while they were here visiting. It was so great to see familiar faces. Plus, now I know another Midwest transplant that I can go into DC and do things with! So, we ate dinner at this fantastic little rowing themed place right off of Georgetown's campus. Then he decided to head into DC and tour some of the memorials at night! Again, we had a great time! Alan was in heavan as our personal tourguide, and we got to wander and chat and catch up. It was the perfect ending to a looooooong and exhausting day.

Sunday...

We got the chance to relax for a little bit on Sunday, but Alan was scheduled to dive at the National Aquarium in Baltimore. So, we made plans to buy a couples annual pass and then wander around the aquarium for a bit before he had to go dive. He has had the change to dive here 3 times (I think..) before, but this is the first time that I've been able to be on the other side of the glass watching. I've never seen him dive before. It was SO fun! It was truly beautiful getting to see him swim with the fishies and help out the other divers. I was his fanclub and photographer for the afternoon.

Even though I was exhauted, it was an amazing weekend! We had so much fun and this is exactly the type of adventure we love having together. It's what drew me out to the East Coast. I'm not sure I even thought it was possible to be THIS happy. I am absolutely loving it. It comes with it's fair share of work and unsettling things, but adventures are worth it!

So, now it's Tuesday, and Alan is gone to Kentucky for work for the week. He'll be back on Friday evening. I've decided I have to put my big girl panties on and find some things to do. So, I spend yesterday evening renting some movies and just relaxing, which was grand. Today I did some laundry, cleaning, and watched the last movie. I'm about to head off to Michael's to find something worthy of and art project. I think I've decided I need another hobby. For the time being I have some serious time on my hands. I can only watchin SO much TV before I feel like my brain is rotting and I need a break from reading. So, I'm going to go see what kind of trouble I can get into this afternoon and feed my artist within. :) Wish me luck!

Waiting.

Someone told me today that some of the best things in life are worth waiting for. How true! But, how often do we forget that? This world is obsessed with having exactly what they want exactly when they want it. People can get caught up in the fast-paced life we all have to live to keep up with the chaos swarming around us on a daily basis.

But, waiting, when it comes right down to it, certainly has its perks. It's what I've been doing since I moved. I've been waiting for a job. Don't get me wrong, I have not been idle by any means, but mostly just waiting for something to come through or out of all the hard work I've put in to the search. Waiting can be exhausting. I call people and leave message, but to no avail, no one calls me back. I am trying to think of this as a vacation, but selling that to my bank account is a different story. Something will work out. That I know. Will it be my dream job? Maybe. Maybe not. Someone else told me (I seem to have an abundance of very wise friends who are supporting me, and I'm thankful for them)that my first job may not be in the locale of my dreams, but to take it and shine and that will open up opportunities more to my liking. A great tid bit of advice that I have faithfully tucked in my cap.

It's tough starting a new chapter of your life. I'm still waiting for a huge part of that chapter to open up. I feel confident about the closing of the last one. I made sure to soak it all in and make the most of it. I'm proud to say that I accomplished that. No regrets. However, it's much harder work to open this new one. As mentioned above, I'm not sure I could do it without my amazingly patient, compassionate, and loving other half and my dear friends and family who are always ready with a listening ear, dry sleeve, tid bits of wisdom and endless support. A heartfelt thanks to each and every one of you!

So, for now, I continue to work and wait for a job. In the mean time I am still exploring Annapolis and settling in to living with Alan. I'm enjoying life and taking deep breaths as needed. :)

Thoughts over coffee.

It's Tuesday morning. The sun is shining through the window. I am sipping a delicious cup of coffee and Damien Rice is helping me regroup before I start my day.

First let me recap the end of last week.

Friday - I had an interview at St. Luke's House in Bethesda, MD. The position I applied for was a residential counseling position meaning that I would be doing counseling, teaching life skills, medication management in group homes for individuals with psychiatric disabilities. The interview went really well and they want me to come for a second interview. It's definitely not my dream job, but I think I would have a really hard time turning it down. I can't keep 'beggars can't be choosers' out of my head. So, I've digested that and would be willing to accept it if nothing else pans out. It will just be a timing game.

I don't have all of my eggs in one basket though. I think I ended up applying for 3 more positions in Washington DC last week after I discovered that DC's licensing requirements are different than Maryland (Duh!) and I can actually do mental health counseling/therapy there instead of having to have a license that I am not eligible for like I need in MD. So, that was good news. I have just started searching out some places in DC to apply for, so we'll see what they have to say.

I think that's the major update for the job hunt. I'll definitely post more when I know more.

As for the weekend, it was a blast. Al and I spent Friday night farting around, making stir fry and we watched Valentine's Day. Decent movie. Saturday we ventured over to a friend/co-worker of Al's (Jen)for a little swimming, hanging, and grilling. Jen and her husband are from Michigan, so it was comforting to be around some fellow Midwesterners. We had a great time just relaxing and talking.

Sunday we were lazy and spent most of the day on the couch watching Season 2 of Friday Night Lights. Al is totally hooked! :) I love it! We ended the evening with a swim in our own pool and some grilled steaks, peppers and onions, and green beans. It was delicious!

So, I have officially be a Maryland resident for over a week now. Things are starting to sink in. Slowly but surely. I have quite a bit of time on my hands to sit and think about all that I have accomplished and what all has changed in the past few months. At times it's very overwhelming. But, I have things to keep me busy and today's agenda leads me to Borders for one of my favorite past times, wandering around a book store for hours on end. Plus I have a gift card! ha! Gotta love it. I also need to research the library. Getting a library card is definitely on my list of things to do also.

That being said, I'm going to finish my cup of cofee and a few more emails then hit it!

Job Hunt.

This morning I woke up early and made my way to Columbia (about 40 minutes from Annapolis) to my first inverview of the week at Humanim, Inc. This is a non-profit agency that does work with individuals with disabilities. I think I mentioned it previously, but I found out before today that there were no official full-time positions open for the job that I had origionally signed up to interview for. People are all processing and there is a slight chance that someone may not want the position. But, I decided to go do the interview anyways for the practice and the opportunity. Good thing I did. Before the interview, Te'Coyia offered me information about another position within Humanim and the contact information. She offered to pass on all the informaiton from our interview. So, the interview went really well. Good questions, and I don't think I said anything stupid. haha. So, afterwards, she introduced me to the person who is looking for people to work in their day programs. She said she would be in touch. So, not a total loss today. Gained some inverviewing experience and have another potential job lead.

So, that leaves me back at the apartment. Yesterday I decided needed to be a day of rest, so I did just that. I got in a beautiful nap and then lounged around most of the day. It was much needed, and I feel refreshed. Last night Alan and I officially added me as an occupant on his apartment lease and got some stuff figured out at the leasing office. Today I have some odds and ends of things to do, but basicially just relaxing. Al is working late, and I am gearing up for another interview on Friday @ St. Luke's House, another non-profit.

Tuesday.

I am sleepy this morning. But, it is glorious to be able to sleep in and not really have anything to do that is pressing. I feel like a nap will be happening later. The past month is catching up with me. Today is a take it easy and relax kind of day. Yesterday I finished unpacking and putting away the things I brought with me. I updated my resume to reflect my completed degree (YAY!!!) and got that all ready. Tomorrow I have my first interview at Humanim in Columbia, MD. I called to confirm my interview and found out there are no more full time positions, but I am still going for the practice and experience. You never know. Friday I have my second interview at St. Luke's House, Inc. over in Bethesda, MD. I'm much more excited about this interview. But, I'm still on the job hunt. Keep your fingers crossed for me! Eeeep!

Today's agenda is up in the air. I may go drive around and do a little exploring of Annapolis. Job hunting. Napping. We'll see what else happens! :)

Hello from Annapolis, MD!

It is Monday morning, and I am sitting in my apartment listening to some great music and sipping a cup of coffee. My list of things to do is zooming around in my brain, but before I start on all of that I wanted to take a chance to update my blog.

Let's start from the beginngin... It's been a crazy month or so, and the last two weeks have been some that I will never forget. I have officially closed another chapter of my life and am working on opening the next one. I graduated with my Master's in Counseling on Saturday, July 24. It was a bittersweet day, but I can't imagine how it could have been any better. I was surrounded by people who love me and have supported me through thick and thin. I can't tell you that I feel any differently now that I can write my name as Marla B. Alexander, M.A., but I hope that when I get a job it will sink in. After graduation, Alan and I spent the week spending time with family and friends and packing up my stuff in Muncie and getting it ready for the big move to Maryland. It took a lot of hard work - blood, sweat, and some tears - to get it all sorted through, packed, and in the right pile (Maryland now, Maryland later, Storage, Goodwill). On Sunday (July 31) we made the trip together to Annapolis together with about 1/16 of my life's posessions. We stopped in Pittsburg to do some siteseeing on our way and had a great lunch. Yesterday we spent most of the day out shopping and picking up things we need to make his apartment our apartment. IKEA is amazing! So, we got back to the apartment exhausted and with significantly lower bank accounts. However, we are pretty much set with things in the apartment. The rest of my stuff will be coming with mom and dad in about a month! It hasn't really sunk in yet. But, I haven't really stopped smiling since I arrived. This is so exciting and much less scary than I origionally thought. I can tell you that I truly feel like a grown up. I have been one for quite some time, but the 'real world' is calling my name and I'm so close to being a part of it. Now, I just need a job!

Letting Go Take Love

LETTING GO TAKES LOVE
To let go does not mean to stop caring, it means I can't do it for someone else.
To let go is not to cut myself off, it's the realization I can't control another.
To let go is not to enable, but allow learning from natural consequences.
To let go is to admit powerlessness, which means the outcome is not in my hands.
To let go is not to try to change or blame another, it's to make the most of myself.
To let go is not to care for, but to care about.
To let go is not to fix, but to be supportive.
To let go is not to judge, but to allow another to be a human being.
To let go is not to be in the middle arranging all the outcomes, but to allow others to affect their destinies.
To let go is not to be protective, it's to permit another to face reality.
To let go is not to deny, but to accept.
To let go is not to nag, scold or argue, but instead to search out my own shortcomings and correct them.
To let go is not to adjust everything to my desires, but to take each day as it comes and cherish myself in it.
To let go is not to criticize or regulate anybody, but to try to become what I dream I can be.
To let go is not to regret the past, but to grow and live for the future.
To let go is to fear less and love more.
Remember: The time to love is short.
(author unknown)

Journal Article!

I am officially published! :) Check it out!


http://web.ebscohost.com/ehost/pdf?vid=6&hid=107&sid=4041515c-2b58-4cd3-a1e8-e818578356ff%40sessionmgr112

Kodak Moment.

This is a picture from Valentine's Day when Alan planned a brilliant surprise and showed up (aka he flew 700 miles from Annapolis just to be with me on Valentine's Day and kept it all a secret!) at Scotty's in Indianapolis instead of my dear friend Chris. He's truly amazing!

Too long.

I really should update my blog more often. I was just sitting here looking back over some old posts from the past couple of years. It's nice. I feel very nostalgic.

Here is a quick run down of what's going as of right now...

1. The sun is shining and Spring is right around the corner! I can smell it!
2. I just spent a week (spring break) in Annapolis with Alan and we had an amazing time right up until the end when we both ended up sick.
3. I'm still sick, but starting to feel better.
4. I'm looking for a job in Maryland and am moving out there for a grand adventure in August after I graduate. I have some good leads, so keep your fingers crossed for me!
5. I have 129 days until I graduate, and obviously I'm counting them down!
6. I'm excited about my birthday coming up on Saturday. Year 23 had it's great moments along with some tragic ones, but I'm excited to see what year 24 will bring! I will be spending some time with Andy and then heading out for a Goddess treat and then dinner with mom, dad, and Toby.
7. Tomorrow I am taking a content exam to make sure that I have absorbed all of the wonderful knowledge that is appropriate for a Master's student who is allowed to graduate from Ball State University.
8. I have the most wonderful boyfriend in the world!


I think that about sums up what I can think of right now. Enjoy!

Two Is Better Than One

New song in my head....

Loves :)

I thought it was time that I finally posted some pictures of Alan and I. Here they are! Enjoy!

Alan and I in Chicago over Labor Day weekendAlan and I at mom and dad's over Thanksgiving

Spotlight

A little blurb that was written in the IU Psychology Alumni newsletter about yours truly. Take a look.


http://psych.indiana.edu/PsychNotesOnline/Fall09/stories/alumni1.html

You And Me

Love this song by Dave Matthews Band! :)

Wanna pack your bags, Something small
Take what you need and we disappear
Without a trace we'll be gone, gone
The moon and the stars can follow the car
and then when we get to the ocean
We gonna take a boat to the end of the world
All the way to the end of the world

Oh, and when the kids are old enough
We're gonna teach them to fly

You and me together, we could do anything, Baby
You and me together yes, yes (x2)

You and I, we're not tied to the ground
Not falling but rising like rolling around
Eyes closed above the rooftops
Eyes closed, we're gonna spin through the stars
Our arms wide as the sky
We gonna ride the blue all the way to the end of the world
To the end of the world

Oh, and when the kids are old enough
We're gonna teach them to fly

You and me together, we could do anything, Baby
You and me together yes, yes

We can always look back at what we did
All these memories of you and me baby
But right now it's you and me forever girl
And you know we could do better than anything that we did
You know that you and me, we could do anything

You and me together, we could do anything, Baby
You and me together yeah, yeah
Two of us together, we could do anything, baby
You and me together yeah, yeah
Two of us together yeah, yeah
Two of us together, we could do anything, baby

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bi4DZjiZEVo

Weekend...

This weekend has been fun-filled and beautiful! Thought I would share some of it with you before I have to get started on doing homework.

Friday: Great day at internship. Got a lot done and hand some fun with my supervisor just being silly and de-stressing. It was great. I came home and got a chance to veg on the couch and catch up on the TV I didn't have time to watch during the week (Gilmore Girls, Grey's, Private Practice) and took a nap. Woke up around 6 and headed out to Cheri's house to watch some Friends and eat some yummy pizza. It was great to just sit and laugh at one of my favorite comedies. Came home and slept gloriously till 9 AM on Saturday.

Saturday: Woke up to a really sweet text from my favorite Maryland man. :) Made an excellent cup of coffee. Went outside to enjoy the 60 degree weather. I walked for about an hour and had some good time with Mother Nature. Always soul soothing for me. I got to work on a little bit of homework, but I mostly just farted around and relaxed. That's what Saturday is for. ha! Then I went to Puerta Villarta with some of my favorite classmates. We had a grand time drinking margaritas and catching up on life. Then I went to see MJ's "This Is It" and it was fantastic. I was dancing and singing in my seat the whole time! It was a great way to end the evening.

Sunday: Another gorgeous day outside. It feels more like spring than November, but I'll take it! Unfortunately, I need to get down to business today and get some work done. I have a lot of things on my To Do list. But, the sun is out and later I have plans to catch up with the Kruczek/Spodek household for dinner before heading to work at study tables.

An amazing weekend, indeed! It's exactly what I need to recharge my batteries! Bring it on, Monday! (I say this now, not tomorrow morning when my alarm is screaming at me at 6AM)

Quote of the day...

Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved.

~Helen Keller

Halloween Fun

I can hardly believe that it is Halloween time already! A few of my classmates and I got together for our 2nd annual Halloween party! We had a great time. Here are some pictures from the gathering... Enjoy!
The Freudian Slip!

Cruella Deville and her henchman.

Roommates! :)
Playing Wii.

Words Of Wisdom...

"There is a thin line between what has been and what is to come. It is in that sliver of time and space that you will find every bit of who you are at this exact moment. Nothing matters more than the breath you just took and the beautiful image that just flashed in your mind. For that brief second, you just are. That is the present. It is called the present because it is a gift. Be grateful for the gift you give yourself of being alive and recognizing your place in the world at this exact moment. Love that line you are walking right now that is the present. That line is your life. Walk it. Love it. " - Alan Rosenwinkel